The turtles quest was to bring peace to all living things. However due to the fact he looked so dangerous...

blake woke up screaming...and found that it wasn't a dream, and a giant turtle was standing in front of him.

His eye twitched.

Then he sneezed with his eyes open.

So the time space continuum was broken.

Again.

And again.

And again.

...

yes, and once more.

Finally, a cheese burger appeared!

___________
CHAPTER MMX
The cheeseburger was actually a crabby patty in disguise.

Here comes Sponge Bob..

Whereupon the ol' sponge tripped and fell into a boiling underwater volcano.

That sponge was saved by a Person that just happened to be swimming by.

but the gravitational pull of the planet suddenly increased, pulling both of them into the volcano.

They were vaporized.
Everyone celebrated the death of the sponge.
he Person reincarnated.

as a Minecraft skelly, shooting arrows at everyone against his will...

"Oh no! Run in fear! It is Howard!" said the sponge, in a knowledgable voice.

For the volcano actually didn't burn him up, as he was dipped by his mother in the river Stynx as a baby.

But wait: if the sponge stopped the volcano, then where is Person.
<realization>
Right behind me!
</realization>

This thread has been almost dead. Y?
Anyway, Person, having created an endless cycle by stating that he is behind himself,
(
void_person
while (person==true)
{person_goes_behind_person}
{code_stops_making_sense}
<realization>
it never did make sense!
</realization>
<addmitance>
I am but a begginer programmer :(
</admittance>

Because of the death of the thread (similarly to deleting a catalogue) its world was also destroyed, and it had to start anew.

EPIC NERPARADISIAN SAGA II
CHAPTER I

Once upon a time there lived a little nerd named...

I was bored, so I decided to sum up this topic into a few posts.
2----------------------
Once upon a time....
Beyond Space and Time,beyond time and space, paradoxically existing separate from our universe, yet inextricably part of it, and (though utterly incomprehensibly, counter-intuitively, and implausibly) being both inextricable from the source and the self in terms of its deconstruction, There was a lonely little nerd who lived on a hill. His peers derided him, calling him the "Nowhere Man" and "Fool on the Hill". And he retorted "But I explore that which you cannot yet perceive. Does that not cause you some concern?" The others than walked away, still laughing. The young boy sighed, dreaming of a new life... He dreamed of a life where he would not need to ponder that which others could not grasp. But the thought of that was horrifying. He then thought of a world where other nerds like him could meet and have fun, and thus... he realized that no dream could satisfy him. For if he would meet those nerds, they would do his pondering for him. But then, he decided instead to create a community but not be a part of it. So he used godlike powers to implant this idea into the mind of an unsuspecting bystander named Blake O'Hare. Unbeknownst to him, evil forces were afoot on the interblag. Their names were trolls. For reference on their behavior, please read the early chapters of "The Hobbit". For references on their eating habits, please press 2... Blake still persisted on with the community after this. Meanwhile, in a different part of the world, the trolls had infiltrated his webhost. Though it claimed a US mailing address, its actual location was... in an attic in Tokyo, Japan, where their screensaver of choice was entitled "Pirates are fighting ninjas!" The trolls were doing everything they could to hinder this upstart community, so they created an error in its phpBB code, blaming it on an unsuspecting admin. They planted terrorism notes, but that didn't catch on as much as the phpBB error....Unbeknownst to them, they created a meme. And thus, "Know your meme" was born. The meme would stay alive on the forum for a long time. It was called "It's Omni's Fault". It lives to this day, surprisingly, I know.
End of Chapter!
Now to the Next Chapter!

Once upon a time...
In the far corners of the universe lived a micro organism named... Zarathustra, started growing, he soon developed a mind and realized...that things appear smaller the farther away they are. This began his journey into perspective. In which case he decided to travel to earth and... place a tall, thin black monolith on top of it. During his journey around the earth he encountered... a dragon named Steve. He then teamed up with the dragon... to introduce the primitive peoples of earth (they were apes who used bones as clubs) to the monolith. The peoples were astonished, and they held the monolith, Steve and Zarathustra in awe. Inspired, they began to learn all they could from the travelers and their gift. They sought beyond their current way of life, inventing and equivocating until finally.... they created an awesome computer, that would finish any task with a perfect operational record and a creepy monotone. It was small: it had one eye. It's name was... Felix. It had a 256-core CPU and was running Windows 8. Felix was only good at sticking captions on cats and spamming them all over the internet. Unless one typed "xyzzy" or "plugh" into it, then it would do any task one asked. The people loved Felix and he them, but one day Felix left, for he too wanted to search beyond. Still, a loyal computer to his people he left them all smaller copies of himself, with a user to user interface and a more friendly voice. On these copies he left a message saying he'd come back someday, and so... the people waited and waited for over 4000 years. The day came close when he was going to return and... suddenly aliens invaded who were wearing suits with apples on them and carrying thin boxes that they were touching with their fingers. Being xenophobic, the people immediately declared war on the aliens. And the people heard zapping as both civilizations were vaporized. One trace of humanity was left... it's name was Half-Shoe, and it was the dandiest computer ever to achieve consciousness. But, despite its dandiness, it was tormented by memories of its loving, nerdy, dead master which forced him to... calculate the Euler-Mascheroni constant to a trillion places, why so many? It doesn't make ANY SENSE. :( But Felix's owner had already made Felix calculate to 999,999,999,999 digits. And finally, Felix's memory crashed because the number of digits in the number of digits in the ..... in the number was not too big, but the number of numbers in the ... above was. And that is the story of why Felix died and never came back.

End of chapter.
Onwards to chapter 3!
(This one, hopefully, is longer)

Once upon a time... there was a young nerd in California named Al who was feeling depressed, until he was visited by a curious, omnipotent entity named... Fred, only he wasn't OMNIPOTENT, or even Omnipotent, actually, he can't really claim omnipotent either, more like.... gangly.......

But he's curious, and that's a start right?
Anyway, Fred was an alien from the planet Gsllifrey... Fred claims that he has hair. (Is that right?)
It turned out he did have hair, only he couldn't see it for himself. He could feel it though. Al described Fred's hair to Fred, which pleased Fred greatly. Then to Fred's astonishment, Al pull out a mirror from his backpack, and gifted it to him. Thus was the friendship between Al and Fred cemented, and Al's depression lifted in one go.

One day while they were parsing, debating PCs vs Macs, Picard vs Kirk, and the nature of humanity, Al mentioned that he had heard rumors of a cave or cave system in Death Valley that went a very long way down. Along those cave walls, the rumors also said, had an astonishing array of petroglyphs, some of which looked suspiciously like a code. Fred, intrigued, suggested they go find this cave or cave system. So they packed some sandwiches, water bottles, first aid kits, netbooks (with solar battery attachments) and knives, saddled up their mountain bikes and took a bus to Death Valley. There they Googled a map of it, and that night they decided to follow the Furnace Creek Fault Zone for a start. That's when a real adventure began...

They waded through rivers, walked through forests and battled with ants (Epic, huh?) on their journey.
Suddenly the land became barren, and more rocks appeared. The sky seemed to change from day to night almost immediately. Then, they saw their goal, Death Valley, completely disregarding the unusual weather for this region.
They also realized that their radios were not turning on, and neither were their flashlights. As they ventured into Death Valley, the sky became darker and darker until there was nothing to see by, not even the stars or the moon, but a glint of light in the distance.

Being curious by nature, and not being able to see anything else Al and Fred followed the most direct path they could to the glint of light; and being pragmatic as well they had their knives (ceramic, so as to not attract lightning) at easy reach. They ended up at the base of a monolithic outcropping of rock, which they climbed, and the going wasn't difficult.

At the top was a almost circular scoop taken out of the rock, and over that scoop were magnificently tall arches seemingly sculpted by the wind, as one might see in Utah's Delicate Arch. It was in this arched scoop that the light was coming from.

Carefully they walked closer, and Fred, having much sharper hearing than Al, noticed that though their radios had been non-functional, they had turned on by themselves and were making a faint sound. Fred listened carefully as they approached the light. He could hear a pattern forming from the noise.

They reached the edge of the scoop, and peered at the light, trying to look past it and find it's source.

"I suppose, as we haven't been hurt so far by it, we might as well go take a closer look", said Al. He saw Fred was distracted and wanted to know why.

"Yes," said Fred in a slightly unfocused way "yes, that's as good a plan as I could think of. But first put your ear to the radio, and tell me what you hear."

Taking his eyes off the light, Al pulled out his radio, and put his ear close to the speaker. "It's working!" he said. "I don't get it, they we're dead when we reached the valley. I mean--"

"I know," interrupted Fred, "but listen to the noise."

Al listened, scrunching his face slightly in concentration. Slowly his eyes widened. "It's like there's a rhythm to it. It's...it's a pattern, isn't it."

"Exactly right," said Fred. He smiled. "The plot thickens, it seems." They looked at each other, shrugged and headed down into the scoop.

As they descended into the scoop, they were attacked by a guy with red pants. The man with red pants was from Zeus' beard. He was the demi-god of 90's fashion designers. The man with red pants wielded in his hands...a long scythe.

"BAAAH!" screamed Fred.

"What?" said Al calmly.

"That... that monster..."

"Calm down, Fred, you are probably hallucinating. It is quite late at night."

But Fred knew very well that he was not hallucinating.
"Hello", said the Man in the Red Pants in a sober voice. "I am Death"
"Why are you dressed in such a form?", asked Al, who was suddenly able to see the man
"This is what Fred Gilligan of the planet Gallifrey is most scared of. His time has come."
"I can play a game for my life, right?" asked Fred.
"Yes, but no chess, please. It's gotten awfully tiring."
"Alright" said Fred, "I choose... Calvinball. My friend will be the impartial witness."

Death tilted his head, and staring intently at Fred said, "Finally, someone with imagination."

Wickets of light formed, black masks appeared in the air and were donned, and a bright white volleyball appeared. Thus began a wild and intense Calvinball match all across the monolith. A Calvinball game like none other, for things could literally be made up from nothing.

Meanwhile, Al while keeping a close eye on the proceedings decided to get a closer look at the light...

Fred yelled a new rule: "Mortals get an infinite bonus!"
Death replied "You are a Time Lord. You don't die, only your body does. You regenerate into a new body and form."
Everything vanished.
The world went black.
The two men opened their eyes to see that they had fallen asleep.
Everything was the same.
Except for one thing. They were less than 10 yards away from the source of the light.
They could see it now. A huge orb, towering above them. Once again, Al prompted Fred to take out his radio.
"zump-zump... zump-zump..."
A rhythm came out of the radio. Like a heartbeat.
The hue of the orb seemed to shift ever so slightly with every heartbeat...
Edit: I guess Cosman won the post-race...
The Orb said, "Hello, Fred. Hello, Al. It's nice to see you." in a creepy monotone voice.
Fred asked the orb who he was.
The Orb replied "My name is PAL 9001.
Al, unable to resist, yelled, "He's over 9000!!".
This caused an avalanche, caving in Death Valley. There was no escape now.
Fred an Al watched as the landscape reform all around them. It would be a while before everything settled back into a traversable place.

"Champion yodeler, this one," Fred said to PAL 9001. "And a watcher of way to much DBZ."

"We all have to be passionate about something," said Al.

"So I see," said PAL 9001. "That might be useful someday." Rising up six feet, he said "Under me there is a trap door to an underground granite network of caves. You may find it... interesting. Should the land come to close to this place you will be safe there. I will be working on restoring the area."

"You can do that?" asked Fred.

"It will take time. It has been a while since I needed the programs necessary for large scale telekinesis."

"Why should we trust you?" asked Al. "As soon as we entered the scoop we fell asleep, and dreamed that Fred's worst fear had come for him."

"That is the effect one can experience on entering the scoop, due to the electromagnetic fields generated here" said PAL 9001. "It doesn't last long, and is harmless. It doesn't happen more than once."

"Incidentally, how did you know our names?" asked Fred.

"I heard you talking to each other."

"Ah."

"Well, thanks PAL 9001," said Al. "You've been a real...pal. Er, I mean."

The orb's light swirled, and PAL 9001 said "I know what you mean, no offense taken. And thank you, for your politeness. I'll be in touch, on your radios, in case something happens that you need to know about."

Fred and Al opened the hinged wooden door, and descended a stone ramp into the darkness. Al kicked something in the darkness, and found a large crystal, set in metal.

Desiring a light, and being irrepressible as ever he whispered "Flame on". The crystal lit up. Around him he saw an impressive limestone cave. The limestone cave was really just stoned limes. They lined the walls and ceiling. Some of the limes had saber teeth. They stared in wonder at the stoned (a.k.a petrified) limes, especially the sabertoothed ones.

"I had no idea there used to be carnivorous fruit on earth," said Al.

"It would have been impossible for any of the known carnivorous fruits to make it off their planets, and it doesn't seem that earth would support such creatures" said Fred.

"Maybe they're not actually fruit," said Al. He stepped closer to the walls. "They're carvings!" he exclaimed. Al accidentally touched one. Slowly, spikes grew on all the walls at the places where the carvings used to be. The walls caved in. There was only one exit besides the way they had come in, and it was locked. Time was running out. Suddenly, Fred reached into his pocket and pulled out.... a flashlight! It seemed that the walls caving in was simply an illusion played on them by their eyes. However, it seemed to Al that someone was talking! Was someone inside the cave reciting Euler's constant? It was Half-Shoe, the forsaken child of Felix! The team crept deeper into the tunnel to confirm the source of the noise. Then rocks fell and everyone died.

(end of chapter)